Lessons in Love from the Heart of San Francisco
You can get what you want if you know what that is.
Where does everyone in San Francisco go to get anything that they need? If you’re from here, you didn’t hesitate before you answered “Craigslist”. It’s the first stop for anyone in the city who is looking for a job, a friend, a one night stand, a list of the day’s events, a ride to another city, an apartment or just a place to rant and rave. And the great thing about “Craigslist” in San Francisco (as opposed to some of the other cities where the SF startup has now spread) is that there are enough people here with enough divergent interests who are all looking in that same online space that you can get pretty much anything you want there.
So, if you’re seeking a one-armed musician to take photos of in order to build up your portfolio or you really want to find a group of female-to-male transgender swimmers to be friends with … you just post in the right spot on Craigslist and chances are that, with a little persistence and some luck in your timing, you can get what you think you need.
But therein can often lie the problem. In order for Craigslist to work well for you, you actually have to know what you want. If you’re vague, you’re either not going to get any responses or you’re going to get responses that turn out to be not really what you were looking for. “I need a roommate” may be true but “I need a roommate who can shared a one-bedroom studio apartment in a terrible neighborhood with me and my three cats” might get the better response more promptly if that’s really what you need.
And romance, really, is the same way. Relationships work better when both people go into them knowing more or less what they need from another person and the situation as a whole. Sure, there will be compromises and changes to what you need will take place … but things just work better if you have a basic understanding of who you are and what you want. If you don’t know what you want and you just end up in a relationship with someone by circumstance, you often end up blaming the other person for not being what you need when you weren’t even clear about that need in the first place.
Of course, sometimes San Franciscans just hang out on Craigslist to see what’s out there. Perhaps you don’t need anything specific and just want to see what’s out there. Then sure, do some splashing around in the dating pool; San Francisco’s singles scene has more than one diving board for your enjoyment. But if you’re trying to find a certain something, you should probably pin down in your mind what that is before you start advertising it to the world around you.
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1 anja merret - chatting to my generation » Blog Carnival: Observations on Life May 6, 2007 // May 6, 2007 at 2:36 pm
[…] Kathryn presents Lessons in Love from the Heart of San Francisco posted at San Fran Voice. […]
2 The DC Traveler - The DC Traveler Hosts a Carnival of Cities // May 7, 2007 at 4:49 am
[…] Kathryn over at San Fran Voice provides some great information about Finding Love and More on Craigslist (new friends, a job or an apartment and more), which was started in the Bay area. […]
3 Vacation Apprentice: Sights and events from around the world! // May 7, 2007 at 6:55 am
[…] Jul at This non-American Life writes about an afternoon tradition in Vienna - Kaffee-und-Kuchen(coffee and cake). It reminds me of being a kid and my Mom’s yummy home-made kaffee kuchen - her version of a crumb-topped coffee cake that I was brought up with and had many afternoons after a day at school. Evelyn’s blog Homespun Honolulu tells us about the must-see Hawaii Maritime Center . It’s filled with information and artifacts about whaling, fishing, Captain Cook, Hawaiian history, tattoos and lots more about the sea. There’s even the Falls of Clyde built in 18789, the only four-masted, fully-rigged ship left in the world, which is now a national historic landmark. Shedwa, who writes about The Big Apple at shedwa, has a video post about the upcoming Dance Parade. Floats, live bands and dj’s leads a street dance through New York City streets while they demonstrate 43 styles of dance, from ballroom to disco. Where else could you find this but in NYC? Over at What’s Shakin in San Antonio?, Jami has some great photos of the homes in the Monte Monte Vista area of San Antonio. It’s a neighborhood that was built around the turn of the century through the 1920s and has some great old classic homes. Having lived in San Antonio for several years, it brought back some fun memories of neighborhood walks I took through that district. Ruth (one of our own b5media travel writers) at Let’s Visit Asia has a post about the new Westin Hotel??in the center of the business district that’s opening soon in Guanzhou, China. Jaz, a self-proclaimed “accidental Southern” writes in Wicked Winter about the history and full-circle cycle of the Montague Avenue area in North Charleston, SC. John at A DC Birding Blog really knows his birds and tells us where some of the Choice Bird Watching Spots??accessable by public bus in Washington, DC. The first spot on his list is a park I also recently wrote about. Now if he can only recommend a way for me to get rid of the pesky flock of geese that have taken over my back yard. My buddy Eric, over at What’s Up Arlington, writes about Artomatic, an eclectic collection of art with something for everyone in suburban Washington, DC. At Brisbane is Home, written by David, tell us about the recent Brisbane???s Valley Jazz Festival, complete with photo and music links. Kathryn over at San Fran Voice provides some great information about Finding Love and More on Craigslist (new friends, a job or an apartment and more), which was started in the Bay area. Stave at Silicon Valley Real Estate Blog gives us a reason to visit California’s Silicon Valley (and it’s not to stare at all the 22 year old Internet millionaires), it’s to take a Walking Tour of Santana Row. In a submission from another b5travel blogger,??Mary Jo??at The Seattle Traveler, she writes about Chicks in the City. No, it’s not the latest HBO series…it’s about raising chickens for fresh eggs in Seattle. At The Digerati Life??by Silicon Valley Blogger asks the question, Should you Quit School and following in the footsteps of so many Silicon Valley millionaire dropouts? Carole at The San Diego Beat gives us the 411 on many of the events around the city in her post Cinco de Mayo, San Diego Style. Riversider at Save The Ribble??describes a May Day festival and her eco-friendy post about her efforts to stop a Barrage (dam) across the Rabble River in the North of England. At The Picket Line by David, writes about a book on the Underground Economy of the Poor in Chicago. Interesting information. And finally, my entry from The DC Traveler is about the showing of the many mini “indie”??films created at the recent 48-Hour Fim Project??in Washington, DC. […]
4 It’s Carnival Time In Cybertown! | Homespun Honolulu // May 8, 2007 at 2:35 pm
[…] My impression of Kathryn over at San Fran Voice is that she is somewhat of a risk taker. I, of course, mean that in the most positive way! She has no problem stepping outside that societal box and I commend her for this! At this Carnival, she shares great information about, as our host puts it, Finding Love and More on Craigslist. You go girl! You gotta love San Francisco for being creative and brave… Kathryn is quite at home right where she is! Read her About page too! Stave at Silicon Valley Real Estate Blog tells us about a taking a Walking Tour of Santana Row. You guys have got to see this cool place and the human-sized chess board! Aside from that, a chance to visit a place where the Internet gurus hang out is always an enticement for me! Ya think there’s any of their “stuff” available through osmosis? […]
5 Carnival in DC | The San Diego Beat // May 9, 2007 at 12:17 am
[…] Lessons in Love from the Heart of San Francisco (CA) […]
6 Vacation Apprentice: Sights and events from around the world! // May 10, 2007 at 2:41 am
[…] Jul at This non-American Life writes about an afternoon tradition in Vienna - Kaffee-und-Kuchen(coffee and cake). It reminds me of being a kid and my Mom’s yummy home-made kaffee kuchen - her version of a crumb-topped coffee cake that I was brought up with and had many afternoons after a day at school. Evelyn’s blog Homespun Honolulu tells us about the must-see Hawaii Maritime Center . It’s filled with information and artifacts about whaling, fishing, Captain Cook, Hawaiian history, tattoos and lots more about the sea. There’s even the Falls of Clyde built in 18789, the only four-masted, fully-rigged ship left in the world, which is now a national historic landmark. Shedwa, who writes about The Big Apple at shedwa, has a video post about the upcoming Dance Parade. Floats, live bands and dj’s leads a street dance through New York City streets while they demonstrate 43 styles of dance, from ballroom to disco. Where else could you find this but in NYC? Over at What’s Shakin in San Antonio?, Jami has some great photos of the homes in the Monte Monte Vista area of San Antonio. It’s a neighborhood that was built around the turn of the century through the 1920s and has some great old classic homes. Having lived in San Antonio for several years, it brought back some fun memories of neighborhood walks I took through that district. Ruth (one of our own b5media travel writers) at Let’s Visit Asia has a post about the new Westin Hotel in the center of the business district that’s opening soon in Guanzhou, China. Jaz, a self-proclaimed “accidental Southern” writes in Wicked Winter about the history and full-circle cycle of the Montague Avenue area in North Charleston, SC. John at A DC Birding Blog really knows his birds and tells us where some of the Choice Bird Watching Spots accessable by public bus in Washington, DC. The first spot on his list is a park I also recently wrote about. Now if he can only recommend a way for me to get rid of the pesky flock of geese that have taken over my back yard. My buddy Eric, over at What’s Up Arlington, writes about Artomatic, an eclectic collection of art with something for everyone in suburban Washington, DC. At Brisbane is Home, written by David, tell us about the recent Brisbane’s Valley Jazz Festival, complete with photo and music links. Kathryn over at San Fran Voice provides some great information about Finding Love and More on Craigslist (new friends, a job or an apartment and more), which was started in the Bay area. Stave at Silicon Valley Real Estate Blog gives us a reason to visit California’s Silicon Valley (and it’s not to stare at all the 22 year old Internet millionaires), it’s to take a Walking Tour of Santana Row. In a submission from another b5travel blogger, Mary Jo at The Seattle Traveler, she writes about Chicks in the City. No, it’s not the latest HBO series…it’s about raising chickens for fresh eggs in Seattle. At The Digerati Life by Silicon Valley Blogger asks the question, Should you Quit School and following in the footsteps of so many Silicon Valley millionaire dropouts? Carole at The San Diego Beat gives us the 411 on many of the events around the city in her post Cinco de Mayo, San Diego Style. Riversider at Save The Ribble describes a May Day festival and her eco-friendy post about her efforts to stop a Barrage (dam) across the Rabble River in the North of England. At The Picket Line by David, writes about a book on the Underground Economy of the Poor in Chicago. Interesting information. And finally, my entry from The DC Traveler is about the showing of the many mini “indie” films created at the recent 48-Hour Fim Project in Washington, DC. […]
7 SuccessPart2.Com » Online Dating Carnival, May 8, 2007 // May 10, 2007 at 3:36 pm
[…] Kathryn presents Lessons in Love from the Heart of San Francisco posted at San Fran Voice. […]
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